Quiting?

I need to clear this from my mind. It has been bothering me since Monday evening. To be exact, it has been haunting my mind ever since.

 

Monday Volleyball game was not a happy one for me. I did not enjoy the game at all, because I thought a game should always be fun. It turned out that I was not feeling welcome at all, to be exact isolated.

 

It was like loving a girl so much that her action or words against you could stab you in the heart. If it came from other people, it would cause no or minor damage and considered as acceptable.

 

This was how I felt about my favorite sport.  I knew that sometimes I suck and made silly mistakes but it seemed like whenever other better players did the same thing they got an encouragement to try it next time; as for me when I did the same mistake I got scolding instead (yeah, I keep track of the mistake I made and compare with other much better players). I tried to force a smile and apologized because of my mistake as it was my fault. Soon I saw ball not passing to me. I don’t know whether it was intentionally or not or I was just feeling too sensitive, but the feeling was that I was not welcome at all.

 

I was so frustrated that I went to gym straight after the game and showed my anger to the tread mill by running my heart out!

 

Yeah, I am now considering quitting playing volleyball although I really love it a lot. If likened this scenario to a close or special friend, I would also start considering staying away.

 

玩一场不开心而最喜爱的球，就如认识一个会故意深深伤害你的爱人，值得吗？

 

Let’s see what decision I would make from days to come.